On Thursday August 4, 2011 I had my 36 week appointment and my first ultrasound since 20 weeks. Needless to say I was anxious to see our baby. My parents and Reagan were flying out that morning to Africa. They were suppose to stay the night on Wednesday but Wednesday night my uncle Terry, my dad’s brother had unexpectedly passed away. So it was kind of some intense timing, so I agreed to meet them at the airport and to pick up their car. So glad I did. We talked for an hour, mom had a hard morning with my dad and Reagan and I am sure it would be a challenging trip. She teased about me not having the baby before she came back, on August 18th, in two weeks. It was funny because this whole pregnancy I had a preminition I would have her early, but didn’t know if it was because I was secretly wanting that, just because pregnancy was so hard on my body and me in general. So when my mom said to hold off, I non-chalently brushed it off but didn't realize how close that was to my due date and prayed I didn’t have it before she returned.
So then that afternoon, we also had a lady come and look at our futon, the number one thing I wanted to sell on Craig’s list. Bought it for $400, sold it for $350. A nice lady who had adopted foster care children. Then we headed to my doctor appointment. We had to wait for an hour in the waiting room, it usually doesn’t take that long and then they check my vitals. I had two blood pressure checks. One was high and one was regular. Now we have been moving stuff all week, and I didn’t take a shower. Wasn’t expecting a physical exam, whoops… now I know. The doctor came in and asked how I had been feeling. I told her I had been having headaches and stomachaches, not just like pregnancy uncomfortable. But I didn’t know how much of that was pregnancy or something else. So she checked the baby and she looked good and healthy. She estimated she currently weighed a little over 7 lbs. But the doctor showed concerns of my symptoms for Pre-eclampsia. She asked if I could do a 24 hour urine test. We were planning to leave early the next morning to LaVerkin, to move stuff down, take his family boating on Saturday and then go to Terry’s funeral on Monday. We told her we were going out of town, she sounded hesitant. So she had me check my blood pressure one more time, sure enough it was still high. She had me go to Labor and Delievery to be put on the monitor’s and do some lab work. So a little bothered and feeling like it wasn’t that big of deal, we went to Labor and Delievery for almost 4 hours, did lab work. Returned normal, but the doctor came in and wanted me to do my urine testing. We told her we were going out of town for a funeral. She still sounded hestitant, and didn’t want to tell us no, but was still concerened.
She just said family’s can be either very soothing or stressful, and emphasis how I needed to take it easy. So she offered we do a urine test tonight and return it on Friday or come back and do it Monday. I was all for waiting until Monday. Nathan was the voice of reason and felt like we needed to take all the necessary precautions. So I surrenedered to wait a day to head up to LaVerkin. So Friday we took it easy, did more packing, while I was on bedrest and then returned the urine sample. I again had to be put on the monitor. Well it again took a couple of hours. It seemed like not a big deal and the nurse’s treated me like that as well. Then the test results came back, for pre-eclampisa, if your protein in your urine is over 300 mlg, that and high blood pressure are the two main factors. Mine was 293 mlg, so bearly underneath it. So I was considered borderline, the doctor than informed me to be on strict bedrest, can not go or travel this weekend and do another Urine test on Sunday and bring it back on Monday. At this point I was really frustrated, because it cramped my shecdule and plan for I was going to miss Terry’s funeral. So I broke down and cried and just surrenedered to do what was necessary and again Nathan helped me by saying it’s no longer my plan or his, it’s what’s best for the baby. So I agreed. And we all know how much I hate to be on bedrest. So Saturday all day, I layed low, laid in bed, Nathan packed up all my clothes, I watched long and boring movies and it was actually relaxing and I realized how I probably needed to take it more easy being pregnant towards the end, because I was over working myself and would get very tired.
My mom and dad and had been texting me from Africa and my mom was worried about me. So she called me Sunday morning, August 7, she asked what was going on and she was firm in I needed to be on bedrest. I asked if I could go to church and she said no, you take it easy, dim the lights, listen to soft music and watch boring movies. She said take it easy for another week or two and she’ll be back and then I can have the baby. It helped me to feel like I can do it and to surrender again and to hear my mother’s comforting words. She also said to have Nathan give me a blessing and that brought comfort. So we called Nathan’s dad and he rushed over during his church and him and Nathan gave me a comforting blessing. So again, I took it easy. However in the hospital, they said if I had any of the symptoms: headaches not going away with medicine, blurry vision or seeing spots, or adominal pain that wasn’t acid reflex or heartburn, to just come in, don’t hestitate, better to be safe. So I had had a headache that wasn’t going away and I was seeing little black spots. But I didn’t want to go in again, especially since I was in the middle of my urine test, because it probably wasn’t until that had finished that they would have more results. But we had talked to our home teacher Cameron a OBGYN, PA and he said I should contact my doctor. Then I called Todd, and he did say my blood pressure was pretty high and it validated the urgency of it all. So we decided to go back to be monitored. So we packed up and we packed up for the hospital because I just know one of these “Monitoring” visits we would end up being induced, so I wanted to be prepared. Nathan was so excited, like he figured we would have the baby today. I was very against it, due to it being so early and I know my body wasn’t ready, I had no signs of contractions. Then the doorbell rang and it was Melissa Everard and Claudia Rockmaker, my two co-workers from CCSD, was planning to visit me, I think they felt bad I was on bedrest. They were so sweet, brought me a salad and cheesecake and we talked for three hours. They felt like visiting teachers (even though neither one of them are mormon's :) It was comforting because I was really starting to get nervous I was going to be going into labor and mom, and Loni was not going to be there and I felt very alone and vunerable. Claudia told me some things about Labor and preganacy that were just comforting to know I was not alone and she offered to help if I needed anything. They were my little ministering Angels.
After that I felt better, Nathan still wanted to go to the hospital, then his family came over to bring us Sunday dinner. We talked, I complained about being on bedrest and they said to be extra careful, if I don’t feel good to be sure to go to the hospital. Then they left, and I did get a weird chest pain. So then I was like okay let’s go to the hospital. I was fickle though, because I knew there was nothing they really could do than keep me overnight until my test results came in. So I called Loni at 10:30 PM her time, waking her up and she gave me good advice: “Better to be the girl who came in too much, than not enough” so we took the safe side and came in. Sure enough, my blood pressure had gone down due to my bedrest and everything looked good. I was still on bedrest and I asked if I could teach my last University of Phoenix class tomorrow night and they said no. The nurse was very helpful and knowledgeable, she said that I most likely won’t go full term, because the more pain I am in the more my blood pressure goes up but if on bedrest, I would be okay. She said probably around 37 to 38 ½ weeks. That gave me comfort because around then my mom would be back, my body would be better prepared and I mentally would be prepared. However I won’t lie, two weeks of bedrest sounded miserable. So we left. I felt frustrated because I knew the results would be this, nothing. Just monitoring and one more hospital bill, but it also gave me comfort that I was okay and that most likely I would be. So we got home around 10:30 PM, I was so tired and we just went straight to bed. Then the next morning Monday August 8, 2011, we woke up and got ready to go back to the hospital to turn in our urine tests. We took showers and brought everything we had packed for the hospital yesterday, just in case. I was coming to terms that it could be very likely I would be induced sooner than I had hoped. It was funny because I had a simply thought if I did get induced wouldn’t that be cool to have her on Jeannette’s birthday (which was tomorrow). But I kept trying to be optimistic that I had another week or two. So we arrived to the hospital, almost put out because it’s like we know the drill. They gave us room 8 ( we had been in almost everyroom I swear) I remember it wasn’t my favorite room because there was a storage closet and nurses would come in to use it and also it was right across from the desk of nurses. Then again a simply funny thought came and I thought, what if this is the room we ended up in labor in. So we turned in our orange container of urine, yum. And I got hooked up to the monitor. I was worried about my last class tonight. Kept trying to get a hold of people to inform them I couldn’t teach and didn’t exactly know who I should contact. I then had to work on their final and creating an agenda. Finally the scheduler Leann got back to me and was totally cool about it, and was like don’t worry, we’ll get a sub, email me your agenda and final etc. So I felt relieved and did so.
Then I was getting ancy because we had come in around 9AM, and it was noon at this point. Nathan was working on his accounting. I asked if they had gotten the results yet, and my nurse, Caroline, said that they had and just waiting for the blood work. By this point it was 2 PM, and we had been there for five hours. I asked if we could go get something to eat and she said no because she didn’t know what the doctor was going to do. If they were to induce me, I couldn’t eat. Again, a real reality that this could happen. So then they informed me my protein in my urine was high, over the 300 mark, and that my blood came back normal. I still had high blood pressure, so my doctor was going to call prenatatologist and talk to them then make a decision. So then I got nervous. She came in around 30 mins later and was very cool and real. She sat down and said “Okay let’s talk”. Here’s the thing. You have the two symptoms of pre-eclampisa, high blood pressure and high protein in your urine. Your blood work looks good, but I don’t like these headaches, a sign it could get worst. So you are at 36 weeks and 3 days, technically we could wait a couple of days until 37 weeks, but it most likely looks like you would have to deliever then. Right now you look healthy and the baby looks healthy so I think it’s the safer to go ahead and induce you now. There is a chance she will have a higher chance for jaundice and other things. But she was estimated at 7lbs, and everything looks good. She said I really have checked with myself like is this the best thing to do, I asked the prenantologist and they said yes, why not do it while you know everyone’s health is good.” So when she said that, it made sense and I appreciate she really was thoughtful about it and debated and not just being impatient like she wants to just get it over with. So she told me to get something to eat. They are going to induce me tonight at 8PM with a cervix softener pill they put up my cervix. She checked my cervix to see if it had softened at all, sure enough tight as tight. I was a little nervous just that my body was showing no signs of labor or contractions and just how much harder it would be to force it. It was frustrating because I really did not want to be induced for that reason, I know it would make a long and hard labor. But at this point I had really surreneder and was just rolling with it and trusting my doctor and the lord. So glad I got the blessing yesterday.
So then my mom and dad were texting me and then we talked on the phone. My mom said it must be meant to be and it will be better for Nathan and I just to have him and I. She was encouraging and helpful.They told me how I should have Tavia come and help me. She had 2 natural births and very nurturing. So she called me and asked if I was indeed having the baby and I told her I was and she told me she was coming down and I asked if she would bring LeNae and Lana. I then called them and told them and they agreed to come down to my need. Then I called Loni. So Nathan went and got subway and we ate. Then they hooked me up to Magnesium on an IV, it was to keep my muscles relaxed in case I went into a cesare from my Pre-eclampsia. The problem with that is when they induce me with Puctin (Oxycotin) it trys to contract my uterus, which is a muscle, so it was contradicting. So then I kept working on grading my papers and such while I still wasn’t induced and my nurse told me my blood pressure was getting higher so she wanted me to put the laptop away. Lisa and Jessica came over for a second to say hi and to get the scoop on everything. Lisa was great through out my bedrest, every day she would text me to ask how I was doing. Then Nathan and I decided to watch a movie to relax. So we started Maverick on netflicks on my laptop. We were watching for like 10 minutes when LeNae and Lana showed up around 7:30, then Roger and Tavia. It was so fun to see them and to get a recap of Terry’s funeral and to be a great distraction of my nerves. They all said how calm I was being and was really surprised. I told them at that point I had surrendered. I broke down on Friday of the reality this pregnancy wasn’t going the way we had expected. I tried to make jokes about how we weren’t going to make it to our child birthing class we had signed up for on August 15. So glad we didn’t pay upfront for it. Then how I just barely got my maternity leave papers. How this probably works best for timing. Loni would say, "Lyndee you are a primadonna having a primadonna and so get used to yielding to your baby’s schedule." So we tried to be light hearted about it. It was also fun to see how our families would step in during time of need. Like Tavia, LeNae and Lana. And then Lisa and John. It is really cool. So then it was awkward because they had to put the pill up me, and so Roger left, and after being poked, and exposed. I just got to a point I didn’t care who was there. They stayed until like right before ten I think. Then they headed to our place. So then I was induced that night. They would come in every four hours. During the night shift, I had Cynthia as a nurse, nice Asian lady, she was one of my favorites. She was gently and supportive. I had a hard time sleeping, maybe because it was a labor bed with a bar in the middle, but mostly because of anxiety I think. Overall though I slept better than I thought. They gave me an ambien, which helped.
Then around 8 AM, my new nurse Melissa came in to check my cervix, she said it had softened a little bit but still needed something to help it. So they plan to hook me up to Pectin at 9AM. At this point Roger and Tavia and the girls came back, asked how if anything had happened and how I was feeling. It was hard, I was hungry, and they would bring food to eat. But also, I felt nauseous so I didn’t want to eat. I was more thirsty. I told them my happy thoughts were food, ice cream, sushi and a diet coke. I think they came in around 9 AM, Tavia was great she shared with me how Pectin made her sick and some tips on it all. So then they decided they were going to go shopping then come back. So right as they were leaving, Melissa had to come in to check if I had dialted at all. She checked me and forced her finger to be a one, and it HURT. It made me feel very uncomfortable and concerned that I was only a 1, after already 15 hours of being induced. I also called Jeannette that morning to wish her a happy 40th birthday and to tell her I was getting induced. She was so sweet and sincere. She was worried about me and couldn’t believe this was happnening and felt so bad my mom wasn’t there. And told me if I need her to just ask she will be there. I told her Tavia was there and that she was 8 months pregnant herself, to not worry about me, but I appreciated her love and concern for me. It was good to talk to her and told her there was a good chance our baby would be born on her birthday.
So then the gang left, and after Melissa violated me, my doctor came in like only 10 minutes later to break my water, because that usually will speed things up. Loni told me her story of being induced and told me when they break your water it’s like a little prick. WOW. Did she minimize that. Never again will I trust an IRON Woman to relate on pain tolerance. She came in with like a popcycle stick and went up and it hurt worst than Melissa’s check and all the sudden I felt this warm water gushing out, it was a weird feeling. This just made me sick, I was really frustrated and felt my body wasn’t ready and felt they could’ve waited for me to dialate a little more. This then created the “bloody show” where I start just discharging blood. I wanted to die, this was the hardest part for Nathan to see. He said that is where I looked like I was in the most pain. He felt so bad for me. So I then just curled up to my side and slept. Nathan was great he kept massaging my back and pampering me. It helped to keep me distracted the pectin was creating period like cramping, but nothing intense. She gave me some pain medicine and it just made me really drowsy. Nathan asked if I wanted to watch a movie and I said, just put music on, like Enya. So he did. It was a very tender time for Nathan and I. It is when he really was just there for me, supported me, took care of me and helped me. This is what it was about. The gang was suppose to come back and at that point, I didn’t really want anyone there. I think Nathan had texted them to wait to return.
Then Roger and Tavia came to pick something up and felt like they should leave, this was around 5PM. I told themto stay, it was a nice distraction after the 5 hours of discomfort. Also I had been drinking water and they said I could. But then right around then I got so sick, and felt like throwing up, and sure enough they brought the bucket and I did, hadn’t thrown up in 15 years, amazing what Labor will do. But since I hadn’t eaten in like 27 hours, it was mainly just liquid. That curbed my desire for water, yet I was dying to have a glass of cold ice water, just didn’t want to have to throw up again, which I did a little later on. Then Nathan asked if we could invite his mom and I said sure. So she came and grabbed my hand on my side. It was so soothing, she was like a maternal figure I was wanting. Around 6 PM, they tried to check me again, and I was a 1 and ½, not quite a 2, very frustrating after all of this, pills, pectin, water breaking, I was still not dialted. My doctor came in and said that it’s been a slower start than they thought or would like and if I still don’t show progression in the next few hours, they will have to look at a C-section due to the possible health complications. Because the more and longer my body is in pain the higher my blood pressure goes. So then I was frustrated and yet also ready to be done with this forever long process. They also stopped the Pectin because it reached it’s 30, and said it saturates the Uterus so they need to take a break for 30 Mins then start again with a 2, move it up by 2 every 20 minutes. Then Melissa Everard stopped by, I think Amy told her I was having my baby and probably assumed I had had her. I felt bad, I was in the middle of being induced. So I was out of it and yet didn’t care she was there. It was kind of nice to have a little distraction. Roger had left just 20 mins earlier to head back home. So Melissa and Tavia chatted, while Nathan and Lisa chatted. I then talked to Loni about the C-section. She was really against it. She said it limits the amount of births you can have. It’s harder to recover from, etc. So she really pushed for me to try vaginally. I told her I would but at this point, it’s up to the doctor. When Roger left he gave good advice. He said, “Remember your not Loni and don’t expect to do things she would” And Lisa said, well how many kids do you plan to have, so you should be fine.” This gave me comfort.
Then when they started the 2nd Pectin, I felt a strong period like cramp. I was uncomfortable and asked for more pain meds. I also felt like it would just continue to do constant cramping versus contractions for awhile. Then it became more of a rythum. I would have a harder cramp and then this feeling of euphoria, it was weird. Tavia noticed on the scale I was having hard contractions, she said this is good. Also at this point we surrendered to that probably would’'t deliever until the next morning, just because of how slow everything was. They were good to help me with breathing, remember to breath. Then I kept wanting to go to the bathroom, sitting on the toilet was such a relief, I don’t know why, Loni said it was to relieve the pressure. I would then lean on the window cell and almost fall asleep for like 10 minutes on the toilet. Nathan was great, never left my side and never stopped touching me. He massaged my feet, my legs, my back anything. Then I would have loopy thoughts and say loopy things like “Nathan is a good surfer” and then quoting off baking items “Brown sugar and such”. Then it was really starting to stronger and I wanted pain medication. So they checked me at 8 PM, and I had dialted to a 3, so they decided to keep giving this a try before C-section. So then I kept going. Around 9PM I was feeling a lot of pain, and asked to be checked to see if I qualified for the dialted 4 epidural. She said I was still a 3, I was so frustrated, because I didn’t want to keep being in pain, if I was just going to end up in a C-section anyways. So from 9-9:45 PM, it got stronger and harder. They checked me and I had dialted to a 4, yeah!!! Sense of relief. Everyone said from there on out it was a breeze. So then she said we had to wait 30 mins for the anesiologist to come. It was that 30 that ended up being 40 mins we had to wait that I went through the ring of fire. My contractions were no longer hard than a relief, it was just hard or harder, there was no break. No position felt comforting. I was in pain. I was starting to get really onery, like where is the anesiatologist, can I get some pain medicine. I also kept feeling like I had to go to the bathroom, like I needed to pooh. They told me my surface was like zero percent, so it was the baby’s head pushing down on me, and that was very uncomfortable. I asked Tavia how she did it, if I am only a 4 and feeling such intense pain. I was ready for any relief. So then comes in the Anesiologist, with his little cart. Some Asian guy acting all non-chalant, all I could think is they start out making $400,000 a year. My nurse Tammy told me to stay very still and sit up right, but every couple of minutes I felt this pressure coming down on my pelvis, it felt like I had to go pooh and nothing was stopping it. I was like, how do I do this when this is coming down. She grabbed a hold of me and told me to breath and to stay focus. He then put a shot in my back, I was always worried about getting the shot in my back, but at this point with all the other pain, I didn’t feel a thing. I kept complaining about the pressure, the anesiologist asked Tammy when was the last time she checked me, she said an hour ago, he said she should check me again. So then literally right after, I kept saying I wanted to push, she said she didn’t want me to tear my cervix and I had to hold on. She kept saying the empidoral will get rid of the pain, but I will still feel the “pressure” and we all know what Brian Regan means by “pressure.” So then she checked me right away and she was like, okay you are ready to have this baby, I am calling the doctor. She said she didn’t think I was that close and felt bad that she didn’t believe me with the intense pressure of the baby coming down. So it was so hard to not push with her ready to come. So I went from a 4-10 in an hour, wow!! I was relieved that it was going to be over soon, I also was impressed with myself that I had endured the pain of contractions all the way to a 10 without the epideral. So it gave me more confidence that if I had to go natural I could, that I was stronger than I thought. Everyone said I did really well. Didn’t get too upset or dramatic, stayed pretty cool and calm. I think a lot if it is when I am put in situations that there is not much I can do about it, I surrender and just roll with it, I do better. It also was special for Nathan and I to spend the delievery part alone. Everyone left when they gave me the epideral. And it was like we almost wanted to call them because I had just given birth like 20 minutes after they left. But the doctor advise I take it easy and see them in the morning, which I agreed. I was also relieved that it didn’t end up in a C-section. So as I waited for the doctor. It felt like I still had to push, my nurse helped me to breath through it, they were considered the contractions. So it felt like forever, but my doctor was there in like 15 mins. All the sudden our labor room transformed into the delievery room. Because I was so ready to deliever, I didn’t need the stir ups, just the foot rests. I asked the doctor if she was going to cut me and she said not to worry, she didn’t think she needed to. So then they had me push when my contractions came out. I pushed, but it felt hard, I was so tired, so hungry, so thirsty. I pushed again, and I pushed again and I think the crown of the head came out (so Nathan said). Then I pushed a big push and the doctor told me to look down, I saw the head and just secs she pulled her out of the birthing canal and held her up for me to see her. She was covered in all white, and it looked like she had a mad look on her face. She was all swollen and looked like she was awoken from a nap. I asked if I could hold her to put the fluid on my chest so she would recognize it, and for the beginning of the attachement. My doctor said no because they needed to check her vitals and such to make sure she is okay for being pre-mature. I felt sad, also they wouldn’t let us video tape or take pictures during the delievery but she did have Nathan cut the ambical cord, and he seemed a little like a deer in headlights when she asked him. I too was so in such a shock, it felt surreal, like that really is our baby and she really just came out of me. It’s like I knew she was in there during pregnancy to feel all of her kicks and stuff, but sometimes it felt so unreal. I was also so exhausted from the long labor and delilevery, I was kind of just out of it. I just wanted the biggest drink of ice water. We watched as the nurses huddled around her to test her, for a moment if sounded like she stopped breathing, but they did get her taken care of.
The also very cool thing was I was hoping she would be born on August 9, 2011 for Jeannette’s birthday, it was cool because Jeannette was pregnant as well, Jeannette was 10 years older than me and Jeannette was always someone I admired and loved and was like the older sister I never had. I felt like it all worked out accordingly and even with all the surprises and long enduring process, it was all meant to be. We literally had her the 11th hour of August 9, 2011. So came out Audrey Maud, at 6lbs 7 oz, 18 inches long. They then brought her all wrapped up to me. We took pictures and was still shocked by it all. She was so cute and tiny. She seemed star struck her self, like what in the world just happened. The miracle of life truly is miraculous of how it all happens. She was so beautiful. With a perfect shape head, beautiful clear complexion, a lot of baby’s will show distress from delievery and will have baby acne. She didn’t. She had such delicate and proportionate facial features, and beautiful soft dark hair, and lots of it. We even noticed she had little dipples. I hated to be so vain, but we had a beautiful baby girl, and everyone else thought so. The next morning, I even thought we should name her Athena after the goddess of beauty. That might’ve been the drugs…. But I did think she was beautiful, but didn’t want to be that prideful. Yes, we still had yet to have a name at this point.
So then the doctor finished stitching me up, I was so out of it and just looking forward to a glass of ice water. Then the nurse helped clean me up with a new gown and brought me in a new bed, especially since it was a labor bed with a bar in the middle. I was never so excited, she even brought me saltine crackers to munch on. It was like around 12:30 PM to 1 PM. Before she did that, Amy Ekins stopped by around 12PM, like 20 mins after we gave birth. She was leaving for the East coast then to Africa in the morning. She brought me a sweet gift. She brought be the diamond braclet I had been wanting to buy from her from J. Crew, that was super sweet. She was super excited and it was fun to have someone to share the great news with. I called my mom and told her all about it. She was so happy for me and so sad she couldn’t be there for it all. After we got the bed, the nurse came in and washed her, it was fun to see, and then they put her in her little bassinet and my nurse was like, okay she’s hungry. You want to breast feed her or give her supplement. I was like really, she and I just can’t sleep for a bit. So she handed me to her and said, just let her feel around and get used to it. Of course she didn’t latch on and this particular nurse wasn’t that helpful or knowledgable about it. So we tried for probably like an hour, then we finally went to bed like around 2 or 3 PM, it had been a long day. So we slept. The next morning I was so excited that I woke up around 6PM, and just looked at our baby girl. It was like I kept pinching myself that she really was born. I couldn’t believe that was our girl, and I did have this overflowing feeling of love and protection for her. I felt so blessed that she turned out okay and there weren’t any complications. I was so grateful to be blessed to give life, what a blessing and miracle it is. I was so grateful to have such a great husband to share this experience with. He took such good care of me, and he woke up everytime in the middle of the night to help with her. He just loved her and loved to take care of her.
I then knew what Loni meant when you don’t realize how much your parents love you until you become a parent. It was very humbling. I all of the sudden saw myself in the eyes of my parents in the eyes I saw in Audrey. Such love, acceptance, sacrifice and joy. I felt so loved, cherished and beautiful. I even thought that most serial killers, or people like Hitler and the uni-bomber, partly why they were so inhumane, was they never were parents. Something about being parent, you develop the ability to love and give at such a higher level for someone. Not that people who aren’t parents can not love or give to that level, but it forces one to become that much more selfless. I then realized I never let LeNae, Lana and Tavia know we had her, it all happened so fast. So I sent them a text early in that next morning. So then they showed up around 7:30 AM, they were so excited to see her. And like ten minutes later Lisa and Jessica showed up too. They all held her and oooh and ahhed over her. Said how cute and little she was. They all took a vote of what we should name her. Before going to the hospital the name I really was rooting for was Cambri, and Nathan liked Claire and Bobby, he also liked Cambri, but wasn’t totally sold on it. So then he throws out a name we never really talked about, but I heard it before from his family and always liked it. He throw out Ellison and call her Ellie before I was in labor. It was his Grandpa Jones’s mother’s maden name. So it’s a great family name and even cute and modern, since vintage is in. And I always liked Ellie as a name. So the two names in the running were Ellison or Cambri. So we asked our cheerleading team. And LeNae, Lana, and Jessica all liked Cambri, and they didn’t even liked it, but they all said she looked like a Cambri. I agreed. I was torn, because I loved the heritage of Ellison and cuteness of Ellie, but she looked more like a Cambri. She looked beautiful, yet different. I had a feeling in the whomb she was a girl. I also had a feeling she would have dark hair and be a little replicate of me, more in personality than in looks. That she was kind of my girl, and that is why I felt so strong to give her the middle name maud. I also felt she had a very strong personality and mission on this earth. I also felt she had much nobility and sophstication. And maybe this is me dreaming this up, but that is also why I wanted a name to suit her. I was like Nathan where Cambri was very cute and she looked like it, but it didn’t have an enrich meaning to the name. I really liked Ellison and Ellie, but felt like she needed more of a regal name to match her looks and demeanor. So we went back and forth, Nathan wanted Ellison and I wanted Cambri. So while we were in the hospital for five days, we went back and forth. When people asked us her name, we gave them the options and asked what they thought. Most people liked Ellison, I wanted to play it safe and just go for that to make sure it’s not too quirky of a name, but I still hesitated. Somehow we put Audrey in the mix. It had always been a name in the running, but had been put on the backburner, and I think with us throwing all sorts of names we brought it back unexpectantly. Also we said it would be Ellison Maud, or Cambri Lynn.
So then we thought of Audrey Maud, which is funny when we first had looked at Baby names when we first found out we were pregnant. That was my first choice, I always had liked that name. I don’t know why, maybe because of Audrey Hepborn, and my great- great Aunt Audrey Peart who just died at the ripe old age of 99. We then looked up the names meaning, Cambri a made up a name obviously didn’t have a meaning. Ellison didn’t have a meaning. Ellie meant “light” and Audrey meant “Noble Strength” then I looked up Maud and it meant “Mighty in Battle”. It felt like it suited her and I liked that it had such an indepth meaning. So here's to the start of our life long calling of parenthood. So far so good :)
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